In East Germany, they had the STASI to do it. In America, they used the House Un-American Activities Committee. In Western Australia they haven’t got a name for it yet, but you’re being asked to do the same thing – inform on your neighbours.
The idea is that upright, decent Sandgropers should keep a note of what “the bikies” are up to – whom they meet for a drink, who comes to see them, where they might go for a ride and such - and ring the government’s bikie snitch line to turn them in. This is for activities that are not in themselves illegal, you might note.
There are few better ways of turning a community against certain members than by getting everyone to watch them, and inform on them. And as if that wasn’t bad enough, it’s been demonstrated over and over again that the average bloke and blokette in the street simply can’t tell the difference between a patch club member and a Ulyssian or other perfectly ordinary motorcyclist.
Actually, I suppose you could have a bit of fun with this.
Ring, ring. “Bikie Hotline, whom would you like to denounce?”
“It’s my neighbor Frank. He’s a patch club member; he wears a patch with an old bloke on it and the words ‘Grow Old Disgracefully’, believe it or not. Last night he came home at nearly midnight, and that bloody GoldWing of his makes a sort of whistling noise when he rides it into the garage. Oh, and the garage door squeaks as well, I’m sick of it. And last weekend he and some mates went out on a poker run, supposedly to raise money for the Children’s Hospital. Hah! A likely story. Can you come and sort him out?”
“Certainly, sir. We’re here to keep the Western Australian community safe from this kind of scum.”
Markus Wolf and Senator Joe McCarthy would have been proud of the WA government. The rest of us should probably be a little ashamed.
Peter “The Bear” Thoeming





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